


The Vampire of Ire(land)(and his boyfriend Dan)

by orphan_account



Category: Game Grumps, jacksepticeye
Genre: M/M, Vampire!Dan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-10
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-22 19:28:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7451224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack wishes Dan wouldn't baby him.....</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Vampire of Ire(land)(and his boyfriend Dan)

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt fill from tumblr. @i-am-avacado. Shameless plug. Gimme that promo.

"Jack, do you want to go out?" Dan called from the bedroom. His hand was on the curtain, drawing it back so he could see outside. The sun had been swallowed by an array of clouds, and the entirety of outside looked cast in a gloomy gray. 'Ah,' Dan thought, 'perfect weather.'

Dan had posed it as a question, but his tone suggested that there was actually no question in the matter. They were going out today. Days like this rarely occurred in California, and when they did, Jack and Dan needed to jump on it immediately.

"Where?" Jack called back. Dan heard footsteps, and then the bedroom door opened more. Dan quit looking outside and turned to face Jack. He was still in his pajama garb. Plaid pants that he confiscated from Dan (which meant that they were too long, so Jack had to roll them up at the waist to keep from tripping over the fabric all the time), and no shirt. He never slept with a shirt on.

Jack stood in the doorway with a cup of coffee in hand, looking at Dan. His green hair was a mess, swirled around his head this way, flopping over his forehead that way. Like he was just tossed from his bed when, in reality, he woke up like three hours ago.

"I dunno. Ice cream? Pizza? Movie?" Dan suggested. He walked up to Jack and stole a sip of his coffee, which prompted a scowl from Jack. Then he started ruffling through the dresser drawers, finally finding and tossing Jack's blue hoodie at him before walking out of the room.

"What if I don't want to go out today?" Jack said as Dan walked away. Danny just rolled his eyes, hearing the smile in Jack's voice.

"Then I'm sure someone else would love to go with me," Dan teased back, stepping into the kitchen and rummaging through the fridge. He heard Jack huff, then he heard clothes swishing around and he knew Jack was getting dressed. He would never leave Dan hanging to be picked up by someone else, he knew that and so did Dan.

Dan closed the fridge, taking the last swig of orange juice straight from the carton and tossing it away in the trash. Then he went into the living room, plopped on the couch, and waited for Jack to get dressed.

"I hate rain man," Jack whined as he tried, not for the first time, to smooth down his tussle of hair. Dan knew it wasn't even that much hair, but god did it like to puff out like Dan's whenever it got just a tad humid. Well, so did Dan's hair, but you couldn't tell because it was already a lion's mane. But Jack...ha. Jack looked like an exotic animal escaped from the zoo.

"Here, lemme fix it," Dan said, dragging Jack over to a nearby chair outside a cafe. Jack sat childishly, crossing his arms like he was embarrassed.

"We should go home..." Jack mumbled. Dan licked the palm of his hand and ran it through Jack's hair, trying to force it to stay down. Jack scowled, knocking Dan's hand away.

"Stop that, I'm not a child." 

Dan rolled his eyes and continued anyway. He would have no more of Jack's whining. It was always something. Too sunny. Too many Italian places around. Too many offensive Halloween exhibits. And this time...hair. they could never have a nice evening. But in a way, it was endearing to Dan. He liked babying Jack, even though Jack was literally old as sin. But, Dan was taller and therefore he was older in spirit.

Jack took hold of Dan's wrist, letting his sharp teeth protrude from his lips. His eyes flashed from blue to black for a moment "I could kill you."

"Yeah," Dan said. "So could that person over there. So could a wild dog. So could a determined chipmunk. You aren't special. Lemme do this."

Jack let go of Dan's hand in defeat, and murmured to himself about how he should be feared by all, for he is the mighty vampire of Ire and...you know...that thing he always said. 

"You're a fucking child Jack," Dan said as he laughed, finally feeling satisfied enough with his work to let Jack stand up. "But I love you."

Jack looked away, trying real hard to appear mad. "I love you too," He mumbled.

 

So an entire pizza and four ice cream cones later, Dan and Jack called it a night, and started home at sunset. 

"That was nice," Jack commented as they walked. The sidewalk was steadily emptying of people as the sun continued to dip. Clouds still dominated most of the sunlight, but instead of a subdued gray, the sky had faded into pink and orange. A soft gradient that Dan stared at for a second to appreciate it.

"Yes it was," Dan replied.

"Except, you know. When you tried to wipe the ice cream off my face FOR me or...when YOU asked the waitress for the bill when I could've." Jack's voice was dripping with salt. He sure was ornery at being treated like a child.

"Come oooooon Jack," Dan said, trying to make eye contact. Jack deliberately didn't meet his eyes. 

"No! You're...what? 35? And here I am, LITERAL CENTURIES older than you, and you won't even let me pick up the bill?"

Dan pretended to gasp like he was surprised. "You lied about your AGE? I thought you were 25!"

Jack couldn't help but smile and play along. "I am 25."

Dan lowered his voice as much as possible. "How long have you been 25?"

Jack had to bite his tongue for a second to keep from laughing. "A while."

Dan dramatically stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk, putting his hands on Jack's shoulders. "Wait. I know what you are. You're impossibly fast, and strong. Your skin is pale white and ice cold. Your eyes change color, and sometimes you speak like....you're from a different time. You never eat or drink anything. You don't go out in the sunlight. I KNOW what you are."

Jack let his eyes fade to black. "Say it," He hissed. "Out loud."

Dan backed away, pretending to be afraid. He whipped around so his back faced Jack. He took a deep breath, 'preparing' himself for the horrible reality he had come to. "Vampire."

Jack gave a loud, fake roar and lunged for Dan. He wrapped his arms around Dan easily. "Are you afraid?" He asked in Dan's ear.

Dan turned his head as best he could and eyed Jack, who had let his razor teeth slide out. Dan grinned like a kid. "No."

There was a pause between the two of them. And then they both burst out in laughter at the little scene they just did. They both hated Twilight with a passion. And not because everyone else hated it. Jack hated it because he hated the way vampires were portrayed in it, and Dan hated it because he hated whatever Jack hated because he was protective.

Jack let go of Dan, letting the blue return to his pupils. "Dan, you're a fucking child. But I love you."

Dan gave Jack a peck on the cheek. "I love you too."


End file.
